I am probably the last person in the country who would be invited to a Victoria’s Secret fashion show. I appreciate feminine beauty in all of its forms, of course, but I am a married man in my mid seventies. What in god’s name would I be doing at a lingerie fashion show?
Unless I was planning on investing in the trade, or setting up a new knickers range, I would have absolutely no business gawking at a bunch of twentysomethings parading around in their underwear.
In fact, were I to turn up at such an undie extravaganza, you would be well within your rights to point me in the direction of the nearest Spec Savers or call the police and have me arrested.
This is George Hook we are talking about. I am a grandfather several times over, for crying out loud. I thought Victoria's Secret was something the former queen of England kept to herself on her deathbed at the turn of the 20th century.